I think the government needs to get its shit...
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation. It's for procreation.
Woman: But it can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
My ear vaginas just got some sweet, sweet action from these q-tips.
Yes, Dean Pelton just won an Oscar.
that my sneezes sound so damn orgasmic. It’s ridiculous. I can’t control it. But I can’t help but wonder what would happen if I sneeze at the exact point of climax. Maybe my eyes will pop out?
There's Going to Be an 'Inspector Spacetime' Web... →
popculturebrain: hulu: Turns out the question really is when. 4 awesome words say it all: Inspector Spacetime web series. From i09: Word out of the Gallifrey One Doctor Whoconvention is that there is going to be a web series of Community’s Who-parody showInspector Spacetime. It sounds like it won’t be Donald Glover and Danny Pudi in the starring roles, however. Travis Richey, who plays...
I can go on roller coaster after roller coaster and I feel fine. Spin the crap out of me, still fine. But make me watch a shakey movie and I get motion sickness like no other. I first noticed it when I watched Traffic in the theater. Given I was much younger, once I started feeling sick I just layer down and closed my eyes til I fell asleep. Next time I noticed this was when I saw Cloverfield....
huffpostcomedy: Danny Pudi and Alison Brie Perform ‘Everybody Dance Now’ Miss Community much? [via top5funniest] So goddamn much.
when did it become inappropriate to respond “Ehh, Idk. Probably just some mind blowing sex or whatever” when the obnoxious acquaintances at school ask “so what are YOU getting your boyfriend for Valentines day?” after listing all their expensive gifts?
My 6 year old nephew has the most awesome friends
Me: Bam, what your best friend's name?
Me: ...your best friend?
Brandon: Who. His name is "Who!"
I was watching tv
And a preview for a new… movie coming out came on when I found myself thinking “That looks like a Tyler Perry movie, I wonder if it is.” Then I realized, if Tyler Perry makes a movie, Tyler Perry will make it known that Tyler Perry made the movie within the first 3 seconds of Tyler Perry’s movie preview.
Is NBC Putting '30 Rock' In Danger? | HuffPost TV →
popculturebrain: huffposttv: “30 Rock” hit new series LOWS in the ratings last night. It seems not even Liz Lemon is a match for “American Idol” and “The Big Bang Theory.” Yes, “30 Rock” got lower ratings than “Community.” What do you think NBC should do with its 8 p.m. on Thursdays timeslot? I don’t know if there’s anything they can do. The competition is monstrous and not going away....
Kevin Smith Talks ‘Hit Somebody’ and Reveals ‘Jay... →